She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Randomize
