doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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