47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize