...so i touched it.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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