Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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