My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
