Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I think my nap took me to another dimension
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Randomize
