so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
