I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
