you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize