dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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