I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
