As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
