well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
