Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I AM VODKA MAN
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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