I accidentally had phone sex last night
you guys were way drunker than both of me
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize
