The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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