So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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