You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
