Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
