I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
