Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize