he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize