We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
