i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
