i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
