moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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