it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
and you fell through a lawn chair
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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