There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
