i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
