PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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