so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize