Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
