I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
