: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
