wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
