Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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