no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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