If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
