I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
