FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
