ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
