S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
