I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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