Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Randomize
