I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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