Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
