im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
