So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
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