toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
