I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
We named our party play list daddy issues
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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