Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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